Don't Clog My Inbox

Rumsfeld Leaves Most Recent Job Off Resumé | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

Link: Rumsfeld Leaves Most Recent Job Off Resumé | The Onion - America's Finest News Source.

Rumsfeld Leaves Most Recent Job Off Resumé January 16, 2007 | Issue 43•03 ST. MICHAELS, MD—A resumé apparently written by Donald Rumsfeld that omits his position as Defense Secretary in the current Bush administration was leaked to the press Monday, approximately one month after his departure from the post.

So-Called 'Genius' Bill Belichick Stumped By Non-Football-Related Question | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

Link: So-Called 'Genius' Bill Belichick Stumped By Non-Football-Related Question | The Onion - America's Finest News Source.

So-Called 'Genius' Bill Belichick Stumped By Non-Football-Related Question January 18, 2007 | | Onion Sports Cut-and-paste

FOXBOROUGH, MA—Patriots head coach Bill Belichick's reputation for possessing a keen, incisive intelligence and being able to intuitively grasp all pertinent aspects of a problem took a major hit Tuesday when, while fielding reporters' questions at his daily press conference, he stammered through his response to a Business Week reporter's routine inquiry concerning alternative economic approaches to societal trends. "Well, we, uh, I guess it's like the salary cap all teams operate under, as far as… Is commodification the word I want to use here?" said Belichick, obviously attempting to dodge the question in what onlookers called a "humiliating moment of mere mortality for the acknowledged genius." "I don't know if Keynesian theory is what I want here, but… A football game is a service, I guess, in terms of Keynesian market concepts… No, wait, I think I'm thinking of Thorstein Veblen. You know what? Any questions on how we're planning for the Colts' passing game?" Patriots players would not comment directly on their coach's public failure to live up to his reputation,  although some players were heard wondering aloud how a coach with such severely limited economic knowledge could in good faith call himself an offensive innovator.

YouTube - Human Slingshot

Link: YouTube - Human Slingshot.

Wu-Tang Financial

Link: YouTube - Wu-Tang Financial.

A follow up to the Pretty Toney post...

Santa's Trial...

O.J. Confession Book Cancelled | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

Link: O.J. Confession Book Cancelled | The Onion - America's Finest News Source.

O.J. Confession Book Cancelled After stirring up a cloud of controversy, Fox and ReganBooks parent company News Corp cancelled both publication of the O.J. Simpson book If I Did It and a televised interview with Simpson. What do you think?

Frank Rabin, Wedding Officiant "There go my stocking stuffers. What am I going to give to all my aunts and uncles, especially the ones who blatantly murdered their ex-wives?"

Karen Stein, Receptionist "What does this mean for the future of Judith Regan's hypothetical memoir If I Tried To Crassly Exploit Tragedy, Here's How It Happened?"

Oscar Mendoza, Hat Blocker "Now that all this is cancelled, we might never see the conclusive proof we need that O.J. Simpson is the world's greatest crime-detail guesser."

Irish Computer Configuration:

Took a little while, but I finally got this thing configured the way I want it...

A Wish for All of the Difficult People in Your Life:

Bubble 2.0 Meme Map

From Bubble 2.0